Drawing and painting have always amazed me, I really thought it was great to create anything we want, the way we want. So I thought I could make it my job. But I've never been good with art :/
My two sisters could draw easily what they wanted, it wasn't always great but they did what they wanted, and I couldn't do the same, I think I was jealous of their skills.
But I knew artists who were not great in drawings who could be good in 3D art, making models, and such but they told me that it would be better and easier for me if I knew how to draw.
One day (I had like 14 or 15 years old) I was so frustrated about my skills that I just happened to draw anything on a piece of paper, I didn't even know what I was trying to do, but some shapes appeared and I could identify some abstract things, I thought it was cool like "So I'm able to do this :O"
With the time, I tried to evolve my skills, trying new random things, sometime I could do some monsters but I didn't know how to make it again :x
I thought that if I trained myself every day I might be able to raise my skills, so I trained myself ... every day
My friends and my family were not really impressed by what I was doing, it was just crap, nothing great, but I saw I was getting better.
Unfortunately, nobody praised me and with the time I thought "maybe I should stop, why am I the only one to see something, maybe I won't be able to draw even if I train myself"
But I didn't stop drawing or painting, after that I only trained me for fun, a shape appeared, I colored it, I imagined things, that was great =)
So I trained myself during 2 months, each day, then I had to go to school again, and I met new people, some of them were nice, some of them were not but still interesting to speak with.
One of them was a girl who liked making fanart of some manga like Bleach, Naruto, whatever, she was proud of her skills, even if it wasn't great she could do what she wanted to, I've been her friend for a year, she praised my art and motivated me.
After that I was drawing for her too, so she could see my skills evolving. But she wasn't a nice person to begin with and I got problems; one day she stopped talking to me as a friend, she said that my art wasn't original, that it wasn't interesting, a lot of bad things without any explanation.
I thought that I had her respect and it seems I didn't. But it didn't stop my drawings or paintings, I was so desperate that I wanted to raise my skills faster :/
That's the reason I created this blog, to show her my skills evolving, but she never came here, she always ignored me after what happened. But I made a good use of this blog, I could check my skills everyday, anywhere, remembering what happened and why I became like this...
I don't know if she'll come some day, it's been a long time and there's still nothing...
I'll keep the Ink rev section alive to show that I always think about our past friendship, she helped me and if someday I become who I want to be... I don't know ...
I think I would like to see what she's doing, if she's working on art, is she still drawing ?
Many friends I've met, never come here, even if there are online...
People I met on internet sometime come here, it's good to see that they didn't forget me.
Thank you for your attention =')
Meh... I hope they're all okay, and living happily :/
(No Rain, No Rainbows...)
dimanche 30 janvier 2011
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